THE SLOUGHING OF ALL THAT IS NOT
EMBRACING/APPRECIATING RENEWAL OF WHAT IS
WHAT ALWAYS HAS BEEN AND WILL BE
ORIGIN’S TRUTH OF BEING PRESIDES
WITHOUT A MINDING MIND
You do not know what wars are going on down there-
Where the spirit meets the bone.
Anyway, I thought I might take the opportunity to write down every single thing I know, as of today.
All truth is a paradox. Life is a precious unfathomably beautiful gift; and it is impossible here, on the incarnational side of things. It has been a very bad match for those of us who were born extremely sensitive. It is so hard and weird that we wonder if we are being punked. And it filled with heartbreaking sweetness and beauty, floods and babies and acne and Mozart, all swirled together.
even the people who seem to have it more or less together. They are much more like you than you would believe.
So try not to compare your insides to their outsides.
Also, you can’t save, fix or rescue any of them, or get any of them sober. But radical self-care is quantum, and radiates out into the atmosphere, like a little fresh air.
It is a huge gift to the world.
When people respond by saying,
“Well, isn’t she full of herself,” smile obliquely,
like Mona Lisa,
and make both of you a nice cup of tea.
Just try to bust yourself gently of the fantasy that publication will heal you, will fill the Swiss cheesy holes. It won’t, it can’t. But writing can. So can singing.
When Blake said that we are here to learn to endure the beams of love, he knew that your family would be an intimate part of this, even as you want to run screaming for your cute little life. But that you are up to it. You can do it, Cinderellie. You will be amazed.
Grace won’t look like Casper the Friendly Ghost; but the phone will ring, or the mail will come, and then against all odds, you will get your sense of humor about yourself back. Laughter really is carbonated holiness, even if you are sick of me saying it.
My pastor says you can trap bees on the floor of a Mason jar without a lid, because they don’t look up. If they did, they could fly to freedom
The love of our incredible dogs and cats is the closest most of us will come, on this side of eternity, to knowing the direct love of God; although cats can be so bitter, which is not the god part: the crazy Love is.
Also, “Figure it out” is not a good slogan.
But their absence will also be a lifelong nightmare of homesickness for you.
All truth is a paradox. Grief, friends, time and tears will heal you. Tears will bathe and baptize and hydrate you and the ground on which you walk. The first thing God says to Moses is, “Take off your shoes.”
We are on holy ground.
Hard to believe, but the truest thing I know.